Criticism, Who Matters & Stupid People

I find criticism to be a near-dead art. Some people are so stupid that it actually hurts my head thinking about how much brainpower it does NOT take to be such a moron. Honestly, who in their right mind can be so idiotic as to tell someone they did a “good job” when they clearly did not?

I speak for all the people out there that make mistakes, do stupid things, write bad reports, get horrible grades, or fail tests and their turn-around is “at least you tried” or “it was a good effort” or my personal favorite: “I’ll give it to you this time, but next time I expect better!”… and then they never get better. But why do they never get better? I’ll tell you why, I will tell you good.

It’s because no one ever tells them they did a bad job. When someone fucks up, you criticize them. If you don’t, they are most definitely going to fuck up again. Whether they screw the pooch in the same area, or just use the same tactic in another field, they will most definitely blow everything to hell in a fiery hell storm of failure and low efficiency. Humans are designed to suck at things. When you are born, you can’t do shit. All you can do is blabber nonsense, blow spit bubbles, crap yourself, eat and sleep. It’s the painful, burning, criticizing furnace of life that shapes the blade of a human body, mind and soul into a deadly weapon of practical use and deliverance. That’s why when someone completely defies this rule and plays the “nice” guy, I wanna shove my foot straight up their ass.

I get so pissed off and ridiculously steamed when I see someone screw up, and someone else tells them it’s okay. No, it’s NOT okay. I need to tell you it’s wrong, criticize you for your dumbass mistake, and hopefully next time you get it. If it was fucking okay, you wouldn’t be fucking up. You’d be doing the world a favor by knocking your mother’s fine china into a million infinitesimal pieces! If it was okay, I wouldn’t wanna slap you for doing something so stupid. Okay is getting a C. If you get an F, you “F”ucked Up. F stands for failure, fucked, flop, fold, forsake, foolish, fault, flunk. F does not stand for finished, flying colors, fulfill, fantastic, fantabulous.

What’s even worse is when someone else does bad, gets a small “it’s okay, just try harder next time”, and I get a huge kick in the ass for doing not as bad as that person, but still doing bad. I literally wanna take a hot soldering iron and shove it in their skull when someone does that to me. I’m not an angry person, but for God’s sake, get a friggin Phillips and screw your head on straight. Don’t criticize me and let a retard get away with it. Just because they are handicapped doesn’t mean we can’t attempt to help them out by telling them they did a no-no.

I can’t help but also explore the “who matters” of criticism. I walk around every day and see girls call themselves fat, ugly and stupid. Their boyfriends tell them otherwise, and they say “but you’re the only one that tells me that” or “but no one else thinks the same way”. Who gives a shit, seriously? Your boyfriend loves and respects you. Take the damn compliment, don’t let anyone else tell you otherwise, and stick your steel-toe drop kick that every girl seems to possess in the next guys crotch that does. You girls are NOT ugly if we are telling you so. We wouldn’t fucking date you if you were. I know, every guy “claims” they only care about the inside. But I swear to God, His Son, Allah, the Greek Deities and your Mother that when someone says that, they are lying out their ass.

Ya, sure, when you say “ugh, that girl is so damn ugly”, and someone dates them you THINK it’s because they only care about personality. No no no, this is not true. The reason is because what YOU think is hideous, someone ELSE thinks is fan-fucking-tastic. Ever heard of chubby chaser? I can’t understand how my friend can date a 250 pound girl, but he does, and he loves every second of it. We all have different opinions. Trying to get the whole worlds approval will kill you faster than it helps you. You’ll be dead before you fix your self esteem.

Something else I find absolutely perfect about external criticism is when some inbred jackass comes out of nowhere and ruins your day by calling you a dumb shit and you actually LET IT SINK IN! Okay, so really, you’re gonna let some random stranger ruin your entire personal profile on yourself? If even for a day? Well, then he was right, you really are stupid. I love it when someone says “Oh my GOD that guy was so stupid! LOL I can’t believe he was so fucking dumb to call me that. Hahaha, now I’m gonna act like a dick biting asshole for the rest of the day because he infuriates me… but he doesn’t matter.”

Okay, so if he doesn’t matter, why the fuck are you so pissed off about it? Ya, it’s because you do care what he says… you’re just too pussy and realize you’d be a retard to admit that fact.

The only people that matter in your life in the ways of criticizing words are your family and closest friends. This includes brothers & sisters, mothers & fathers (although this one is the be decided in some areas), your best friend of 10-30 years, your girlfriend/boyfriend, husband/wife and priests. Priests are the favored children of God, whatever they say matters. My Grandpa can contest to that one.